“Because I like you,” she said, “and I don’t want anything from you.”
“Why is it,” he said, one time, at the subway entrance, “I feel I’ve known you so many years?”
“Because I like you,” she said, “and I don’t want anything from you.”
-Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

The main mistake we make in relationships is that we view relationships as something where we find happiness and fulfillment. But nothing could be further from the truth. If I am happy, every relationship I find myself in will reflect my happiness. If I’m depressed, the relationship will show my pain.

If I believe that my partner will make me happy, I will blame you for my unhappiness. If I’m calling you to make me happy, I guarantee you’re calling to make me happy too. In such situations, we all hope to achieve the impossible. It won’t be enough, it won’t be right, it won’t last long. This is a wrong design. If my life makes you happy, that means I should take care of you and see what I’m doing. Of course we are connected to each other; but we never told each other. We must be guided by our own knowledge of the truth felt and manifested within us. From that place, a place of deep connection and fulfillment with my true self, I can approach my partner with compassion and a desire to see you well; as a game in the land of love. But what I do will depend not on how well I read your mind, but on my own level of well-being, my thoughts, and my clarity with myself. It’s not even possible to find satisfaction outside of yourself. Never in the history of the world has anyone found fulfillment outside themselves. Alexander the Great conquered the entire known world. No respect. Bernie Madoff stole $60 billion. This is not enough. Unnamed actors are paid millions of dollars for a movie, but from all observations, they are not happy. So maybe it’s love? I remember once my friend  complaining that his relationship wasn’t working. I  said: “My friend, here are some of the biggest names in Hollywood married to the dream women of our time.” Goddess. What you are looking for is not available. There’s no such thing as “happily ever after.”

Our job is to understand that contentment lies deep within ourselves and then find others working to find a place for themselves. When we both see each other, we have the opportunity to create something greater than either of us can achieve.